


Some People (Be Crazy)

by loosecloudymist_OperaEagleAce



Series: Relentless [1]
Category: Katekyou Hitman Reborn!
Genre: Day 1 of khr rarepair week, F/M, More to come!! - Freeform, and then it devolves into khr mafia shenanigans REALLY FAST, but I'm also not giving any more hints, chloroform at 3 am prompt, so um this is a Trip, we start at the supermarket, yaaay!, you gotta be ready for this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-22
Updated: 2019-06-22
Packaged: 2020-05-16 14:36:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,039
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19320175
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/loosecloudymist_OperaEagleAce/pseuds/loosecloudymist_OperaEagleAce
Summary: "What the heck was Sasagawa Ryohei doing in the supermarket at this late of an hour? Hana didn't need to provide an excuse, of course. She could go wherever she wanted whenever. Mr Extreme Morning Rooster, on the other hand, should be sleeping so he could rest up his vocal chords for the next morning's loud neighborhood greetings. He didn't get to be a natural night owl and morning bird. That just wasn't bloody fair.Her thoughts were abruptly cut off when she saw the singular item Ryohei was purchasing. Chloroform? Ryohei? She looked back at the chloroform, then back at innocent, upbeat Ryohei. This was something she had to intervene in."Ryohei goes to the supermarket at 3 AM and buys chloroform, which is highly suspicious. Hana attempts to stop him and gets sucked into a Mafia Adventure.Wonderful.





	Some People (Be Crazy)

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you're ready for this ride.

Hana had always secretly ogled the body of her best friend's brother--who  _ wouldn't _ , Ryohei was so ridiculously, handsomely muscular--but her attraction firmly stopped there. It did. It really did. He was just a brainless monkey too attached to his sport like the rest of the boys at school. She didn't notice the way his smiles lit up a diameter of at least ten meters or his boundless optimism and enthusiasm. At all. 

But to be fair, he made it extremely hard to stop thinking about his personality, because she was around Kyoko--and thus Ryohei-- _ all the time _ , and he was loud and extreme and _ himself _ ,  _ all the dang time _ . 

And she wasn't pouting about it. 

At all. 

What the heck was he doing in the supermarket at this late of an hour? Hana didn't need to provide an excuse, of course. She could go wherever she wanted whenever. Mr Extreme Morning Rooster, on the other hand, should be sleeping so he could rest up his vocal chords for the next morning's loud neighborhood greetings. He didn't get to be a natural night owl  _ and _ morning bird. That just wasn't bloody fair. 

Her thoughts were abruptly cut off when she saw the singular item Ryohei was purchasing. Chloroform? Ryohei? She looked back at the chloroform, then back at innocent, upbeat Ryohei. This was something she had to intervene in. Who knew what Kyoko would do to her if she found out Hana knew about this and hadn't tried to protect her brother's innocence (or at least criminal record). 

"Hey, boxing monkey? I don't think you want to buy that," Hana told him in as roundabout of a way as she could. She was naturally very blunt, and at times like this she found herself quite lacking a softer touch. 

Ryohei turned around and stared uncomprehendingly at her for several seconds straight. Why had she even bothered? He was a complete monkey, his mind was still a child's. She grabbed the chemical container and made to chuck it somewhere in the farthest recesses of the store where Ryohei couldn't track it down, when her wrist was caught by Ryohei's warm, steady hand. 

"Why not?" he asked, that lack of understanding and childlike curiosity still coloring his expression. 

"You probably don't even know what this is," Hana informed him, twisting out of his grip, turning to face him with her arms crossed. "It's a chemical that can be fatal in high doses, and it screws with the nervous system. You'd be better off getting melatonin if you just wanted something that would put you to sleep." 

Ryohei blinked, and suddenly his face was engulfed by that effusive smile and he broke out into raucous laughter. After he calmed down, he actually had the nerve to  _ hug _ her before explaining himself. She pushed him away. 

"I know what I'm doing," he informed her, and man, when had his voice gotten so deep? "But thanks for the advice! I'll use it." 

Breathing out a sigh of relief, she watched as Ryohei retreated to the spice aisle with the chloroform safe in her hands. She hid it quickly and then went to check out her ice cream. 

All feelings of triumph vanished when she saw that he had picked up another bottle of chloroform with the melatonin. Really?! Did he have chronic amnesia or something? 

"Hey. Monkey! Don't you remember telling you not to use this?" She tapped the bottle, awaiting his explanation. 

"You never specifically said that…" Ryohei pointed out, trailing off sheepishly at her sharpened glare. "This is for knocking people out. The melatonin will help me knock myself out. I understand what I'm doing perfectly!" 

Hana couldn't believe she was having this conversation in the deserted grocery store at three AM. "Do you? Because you look like the kind of person who would just slap some liquid on someone's face and expect they went to sleep. If you do that with chloroform, it will kill the person. Just so you know. Also, you have to put that kind of melatonin into tea to digest it, not swallow it dry." 

He looked surprised. "Oh. Thanks for the tips!" 

Hana sighed, uncrossing her arms. "Yeah, sure, whatever. Just don't get arrested." 

In about three seconds flat, he was halfway down the street, and Hana remembered that she'd practically given him permission to use the chloroform. What in the world did he need to use it for, anyway?

She burst out onto the street. "Wait!" she cried, running as fast as she could, which was nowhere near Ryohei's top speed. Curse his fitness. He looked back, and gave her this surprised, impish look, that caused her to grit her teeth in determination. 

He stopped outside a warehouse, for some reason. Hana caught up with him there. "Don't…" she gasped. He was getting closer to undoing that lock. "Don't use the chloroform… I didn't mean…" 

At that point, Ryohei got fed up and actually  _ punched _ the lock in (presumably through sheer force, and wow, hot). They were faced with Gokudera and Chrome fighting about a thousand armed thugs and actually doing a pretty good job of keeping them back. A sandy-haired boy that she'd seen around town with Sawada-san before was tied up in a chair in the middle of the room. 

Ryohei opened his mouth and immediately lost the advantage of surprise by shouting, "I've got the chloroform!" 

"If you're going to use it, douse a  _ cloth  _ with it, you imbecile," she snapped at him on autopilot, seething. There was no way she was getting out of this situation now. 

"Great idea!" Ryohei said, and then proceeded to dump half the bottle's contents on his shirt. Hana sighed. Her life and sanity escaped through her lips. 

"Don't breathe it in!" she yelled a moment later, panicking. Ryohei was having to fight at the same time that he gave her a thumbs up and ripped his shirt off. He flung the article of clothing at her and she gaped. 

"That was _ completely _ unnecessary, monkey," she yelled at him. Again. What was it about him that made her lose her cool? That flipping  _ chest.  _ Not. Fair. 

He shot her an infuriatingly happy smile while uppercutting a guy and sweeping another one's legs out from under them. "Take it to Gokudera Hayato!" he instructed her. "He was the one that asked for it, anyway!" 

"Don't tell me what to do," she snapped back at him. She knew Gokudera from class, had already located him in the pandemonium. "Give me the rest of the bottle, monkey, you can't be trusted with it."

Surprisingly, he didn't argue, just threw the bottle at her while he dove deeper into the fighting. He might be an utter snack, but dating him would drive her insane. 

Obviously this mission was rescue of the kid. The others could handle the fighting, she'd rescue the kid no problem. No need for deliveries or whatever asinine, convoluted plan Gokudera had dreamed up. 

She slipped her way through, getting hit by stray limbs now and again. It was surprisingly easy to melt into the crowd and not be noticed. She emerged in front of the kid soon enough. 

"I need a sharp tool to cut through the rope," was the first thing he told her. She could already tell they were going to get along famously. 

"Let's wait till we're out," Hana argued. 

"Tied to the chair," the kid argued, and okay, maybe he had a point. Hana grabbed one of the random people brawling next to her and pressed the chloroform to his mouth until he stopped twitching. Huh. Strangely empowering. Then she searched for weapons and frowned when there was only a small gun and more rope on him. She pulled the next person, and there was a Swiss army knife on that one. She sawed through the hand ropes and then handed the knife off to the kid while she kept lookout and suffocated any approaching enemies. 

"My name is Fuuta," said the kid. "I'm sorry you had to come, but thank you." 

"The Sasagawa monkey got me into this mess," Hana muttered sourly while she dropped a victim. "Blame him. I definitely am. Chloroform at three AM?" 

"I think Hayato-nii had an elaborate trap with that," Fuuta mused. "It's probably for the best they didn't get the chance to carry it out. Hibari-san and Tsu-nii will be happy."

"Wonderful." 

"Ryohei-nii gets carried away," Fuuta continued. "He's just so full of life! He loves to play with us, me and my siblings, and he gets too into it. But in the end he always knows just what to say to us, and he spends a lot of time with us, while Tsu-nii and Hayato-nii are always busy. Oh, I'm free now!" 

"Fabulous. Take this part of the shirt--" Hana ripped a chunk off "--to defend yourself. Here we go." 

'.(.&

They made it out twenty minutes before any of the rest of the band. All the grunts in the warehouse were knocked out or properly cowed, and they came out screaming for Fuuta. 

"I'm here, I'm here!" he yelled back. "Hana helped me!" 

"Of course Sasagawa gave the chloroform to an untrustworthy messenger," Gokudera muttered at her mulishly. Hana stared him down. 

"You were taking too long," Hana explained. 

"We had a plan," Gokudera sourly bit out.

"A  _ great _ plan," Chrome confirmed with huge, pleading eyes that Hana did not trust after seeing the serious butt that girl could kick just a couple minutes ago. 

"An EXTREME plan!" Ryohei finished, pumping a fist into the air with a puppy-like expression of pure joy. 

"You just had to get the kid," Hana said. "That was _ it _ ." 

"You wouldn't understand," Gokudera dismissed, huffing. 

"I understand completely," she snapped. "You wanted a challenge and in the process wanted to make it overly complicated because that's fun.  _ You _ wanted to fight because you like fighting--" she pointed accusingly at Ryohei, who nodded almost happily, and she narrowed her eyes. "--and seeing what destruction Gokudera can cause. The same for _ you _ \--" Hana surmised, accusing Chrome with half-knowledge and inferences. "--except it's more of a mind game." She side-eyed them sharply at their silence. "Well? Am I  _ wrong _ ?" 

"Nope!" Ryohei admitted, a big adorable ball of sunshine she needed sunglasses for. 

Chrome watched her with a wide-eyed look and curve to the lips that Hana took for agreement, and the snobbish expression of Gokudera said it all for him. 

"Okay then," Hana said. "Here is where I leave you, never to return. Next time focus on rescuing the kid. Then you can go back and beat up all the idiots you want." 

"I'm coming with you," Fuuta piped up, grabbing onto her shirt. He was a kid, but not snotty-nosed, and he'd proved he could handle himself. Hana could handle his presence in turn. 

"Yeah, sure," she agreed, walking away with him. 

"Wait!" Ryohei raced after them, somehow managing to jog beside them while they walked at the slowest pace ever. "Go out with me, Hana!" 

She looked at his stupidly hopeful face and definitely didn't eye his ripped chest that he still hadn't found a shirt for. 

"In your dreams," she snapped back at him. What other answer could she give him? He definitely wasn't the romantic, mature man she wanted, and she couldn't see a relationship going anywhere. They were too different. 

"I really like you, Hana!!" he yelled after her. "I won't give up until you go on just ONE date with me!" 

She studiously ignored his impassioned promises in the background. "He'll see that I'm not the girl for him and give up soon enough," she mused. 

"I think you're underestimating Ryohei-nii," Fuuta submitted. "He never gives up. He won't give up until you've just given him a chance. His energy is really overwhelming, but when the intensity of his focus leaves there's a peace and warmth of his that stays with you," Fuuta described, smile overtaking his face. 

"Maybe," Hana considered skeptically. "But it will take a miracle before I actually agree to go on a date with him."

As it turned out, Ryohei's obdurate determination was a miracle in and of itself. 

**Author's Note:**

> Ahaha, we'll get there soon enough Hana. It was really unfair that First Date was the /second/ day of rarepair week. Anyway, my favorite line in this entire thing is "He might be an utter snack, but dating him would drive her insane." The part at the end where she chews them out is a close second though. 
> 
> Alright, see you when I post the next part! Please drop a review!


End file.
